An Update you never asked for

Soundwave back again. Seeing as I still haven't had any emails regarding computer problems (either everyone has an Imac or no-one trusts my fixing skills) I am in a rather...stuck position.

Time to make things up again. Here is a letter I allegedly received last night from...er. ah.. Sir Optimus Prime. This is what it said.

"Dear Soundwave the great who is the best computer technician I have ever known and ever will. I admire your skills so much and I wish I was half as intelligent as you. Everyday I look at your face I just wanna- oh yeah. The computer problem. Last week I brought an Imac for some strange reason, despite my doctor assuring me I was on the recovery. I was trying to Sync my Iphone with my Imac to update my playlist of all 55 Cliff Richard songs and all the hits the Beegees had. So my Iphone correctly read 57 songs on device but my Imac keeps stating there is only 45. So did some get lost? I appreciate you taking the time out from your breathing exercises to help me with my made up problem, that is if you do help me. Otherwise I am not grateful." 

Yours Sincerely,

Peter Cullen.

12345 Run out of numbers soon Street,

Paved over Town,

Kent,

Cybertron,

Well Optimus. Where do I start? Firstly, I am surprised you dared to even have the audacity to purchase a Computer, although I am glad you opted to buy from the more cheaper range, the Imac's, -cough cough-, excuse me I have a bad cough. But still, I know it is none of my business but how did you get the money for a computer? I thought you were only charging $5 a kiss at the beauty pageant. Or..the last time I was there you were... Anywho (I've always wanted to say that) sweeping aside the massive amounts of money you have mysteriously acquired through some means that HM Revenue and Customs would love to know about, (although they have enough money so I won't tell them) have you tried Restarting (or rebooting if your feeling clever) your Iphone? I find mine often freezes. Not that I have one. Almost as much as Blackberry's. Not that I have one of them either. What do you think i'm made of? Actually...don't answer. You might want to try Rebooting your Imac as well. Do you have all the latest anti-virus's? A common virus found on many Imac's me and the good folk at PC world inspect is one called "MAC OS X. It disguises itself as part of your system and users are tricked into downloading by it's fake positive reviews and it pretends to be useful but what you don't see is how much it is destroying your system behind the scenes. A similar problem used to be found on windows based machines (if such a term even makes sense) A common one was called "Windows Vista". There was also "Windows XP" but this was easier to remove unlike Vista and some users even insisted it had positive features unlike the notorious Vista which is famous for bringing down and bringing to a halt over 600,000 computers and 20,000 business's in the all to well known 2004 "Vista Gate" which occured on 21st August 2004. Since that day people every year on the same date burn discs which have been known to carry the virus, while shouting " Burn. Burn!" So I hope none of this helps you and so hopefully the problem will persist and you will need my advice again or at least pretend to. 

Yours only a tiny bit Sincerely,

Bar- I mean. Shockwave.... No that's the other one. Soundwave. (V2.0. With Linux kernel. Whatever that means)

The Kent reference in the letters address is how I've noticed Kent seems to be everywhere, get mentioned everywhere etc and I like to think Kent would somehow even exist in Cybertron in some way.

For those who don't know. The seemingly random date for my Vista joke is actually my Birthdate with the exception of the year as I was born in 1992 but obviously Vista wasn't around then.

As usual, By Barry Luke Stuart.