Phone rings-
"Hello, 321 flirters, Optimus here"
"Hi This is June. My son Megatron, completely innocent I might add, received an email from you. I am disgusted by what you do!"
"Ma'am. Before I answer, can you give me a second to sit up straight so I can pretend to listen to you."
"Certainly"
Thankyou. Now how can I say I'm sorry? Take your son out for a date? Show him there is more than meets the eye?
No! Absolutely not.. Well apart from the second option. I mean the first.
Listen give me your email and I'll apologise to him face to face.
Well ..I.
Come on. It won't take a second.
Well... I
I need your email?
Well...ok..
......Yes?
"JuneIweartightT-shirtsinthesummerwhilecookingflapjacksinmidwinter@hotmail.co.uk
"......oh.........I see..why you was so reluctant... Erm right. Accept me then. My addy is Optimalbodyfunctions@coldmail.co.uk
"Right..Accepted. Hang on.. Just turning my laptop on..
What? But you said you was accepting my request. How can you be if your laptop isn't even on yet. It's like your speaking in the wrong order..or someone is a very bad editor.
Well Sorry! You'll find continuity problems in everything.
Even British Shows?
..................Even British Shows!
(Optimus cries into his hands)
June: Anyway...Megatron! That cam girl has come to apologise! She's fully clothed, don't worry. Come on, so we can hurl insults at the disgusting-
Optimus: Ahhh Megatron. Come closer so I can see you.
June: Go on Megatron. I'm going to be right here. Don't log off until you have your apology.
Optimus: Megatronus. I would like to apologise profoundly for what I did. I know it is wrong and making our bodies seem mere "playthings" and not respecting people and most importantly off all making sexual advances to various people is wrong. Sex with anyone is a losers game for people with no life. But making love to a loved one is what real people do. Yet sadly I am a robot and could not see this until now. But my eyes have been opened faster than Brock's in the morning. This is a message for the children. I am Optimus prime. I send this message to all confused people across the earth. Wether young or old. All remaining hero's on earth. Do not tolerate seedy websites. Do not be afraid to express your shock at hearing your friends cheating. Stand up and be counted. Say this is King Arthurs Britain. Say life and delicate things should be treated as such and those not capable of sticking to one partner, those not capable of learning morals that they should of already had, should be ostricised. Too many are afraid. Too many won't Stand up. But I'm not. But I will. This is all true and honest. I am Optimus- Oh crap I already said that.
June: Your name is, " Optimus oh crap I already said that?"
Optimus: June.... Will you marry me?
Optimus: .....And Let me be a Stepdad to Megatronus?
Optimus: Me and Bumblebee split up you see..... And I have no-one to keep me warm on these cold nights. And that long speech used up all my fuel.
June: Oh don't worry. In the next clip you'll have half your fuel back again.
Optimus: Sweeping those contunity issues aside you just mentioned, June. Marry me. Let me be an opponent of Cam girls instead of an associate. Today is V for Victory. Tomorrow is S for success.
June: Speaking of Continuity...I have noticed how your spelling of that word keeps changing....
Megatron: I always thought S was for se-
June: Shhhhh!
Megatron: Sorry..
June: I accept your proposal Optimus. But I Must tell you one thing first... I'm married to Bumblebee.
Optimus: !!! What!!! That's who he went off to.
June: I'm sorry Optimus. It all just started in the back seat one day..
Optimus: Oh I bet it did....
To Be Continued..
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